Love is abundant, and every relationship is unique

Relationship anarchy questions the idea that love is a limited resource that can only be real if restricted to a couple. You have capacity to love more than one person, and one relationship and the love felt for that person does not diminish love felt for another. Don’t rank and compare people and relationships – cherish the individual and your connection to them. One person in your life does not need to be named primary for the relationship to be real. Each relationship is independent, and a relationship between autonomous individuals.

Paragraph one of The Short Manifesto for Relationship Anarchy

For the past couple of weeks, I have been feeling very closed off, very shuttered. I have had a hard time connecting with myself, let alone with others.

The title for that paragraph though melts through the ice, pierces the walls, fills my heart with light and lets my heartshine light up the world. I should have re-read it a week ago. I should re-read it every week. It should go on my bathroom mirror.

Love is abundant. It is. It is there for the feeling. Always.

Every individual is so unique. Every shared set of circumstances so unique. How could relationships possibly be cookie-cutter? How could there be some litmus test for “real” vs. “lesser” relationships?

My Relationship with Myself

I posted something on Facebook recently about how I was feeling very calcified and closed off from joy and self. Two people followed up with me about that post in ways that made it clear they think it indicates a lack of self-esteem. I’ve re-read the post now several times. I’m just not getting that out of it.

There have been a lot of times in my life where I’ve felt less than I should be or worthless. This. This is not one of those times.

Do I feel love for myself? Well, after re-reading that paragraph of the manifesto, I’m ready to say, “Yes. Absolutely.”

What about Warrior-me vs. Martyr-me? I don’t know. I’m struggling to find such delineations at the moment. Though, I have recently sought out a cause that’s dear to me and signed on to volunteer for it. In some ways, I think this is a small glimpse of what a Warrior-me would do/want/be. It is my first active move in a Warrior-me direction in a few years.

My task now though will be to embrace the middle line of that paragraph: “Don’t rank and compare.” I try hard to be the change that I want to see in the world. But, there is so much change I want to see. I sometimes let myself freeze up like a deer in headlights.

I’m feeling much less stuck now than a week ago. Viva momentum!